Abuse Is Not Sexy - Six Signs of Psychological Abuse

It's Domestic Violence Awareness Month and today I am helping Author Kristie Cook "Share the <3" by spreading awareness.

As a psychologist and psychology professor, I've had the privilege of women, young and old, share their lives with me in therapy. Many times I'm the first and only person that they have shared their fears, hopes, and dreams. It is an awesome experience to have someone put their trust in me to help them.

Over the years in my clinical work, I've seen a common thread. Many of these smart and courageous women become depressed, doubtful of themselves and their abilities because of domestic violence.

When most people think about domestic violence, they think about physical violence. In my experience, I've seen more psychological violence and the way it pounds down a woman’s spirit until the woman doesn’t even know who she is anymore. 

Lately, I've been disturbed by the trend in some romance novels that glorify the psychological denigration of female characters by the leading male character, and how this is perceived as romantic. 

As an author, I understand that it is fiction. I understand that fiction is a way for the reader to escape reality and a way for one to live out a fantasy that love alone can change a person. But, at the same time, I feel an obligation to bring awareness that some of the behaviors displayed in fiction are also warning signs that many psychologists use to assist in identifying a potentially abusive person. 

Here are a few signs I look for when I’ve worked with therapy clients:

Your partner... 

• isolates you and doesn't want you to see family or friends.
• makes you feel like you're needy, dumb, or incapable of doing things without his help.
• says he'll injure himself if you ever leave him ("I'll die without you.").
• consistently punches or breaks objects when angry.
• finds ways to embarrass or humiliate you.
• controls you by telling you things like what to wear, what to eat, etc.

If you want to know more about the signs of abuse or would like to speak to someone, visit www.TheHotline.org. And while you're there, Kristie and I hope you'll help by making a donation. Even just $5 can ensure one more call gets answered at The Hotline - an answer that could save a life.

Then, email your receipt to publisher (at) angdora (dot) com for entries into Kristie's giveaway and you could win some cool prizes. Get more entries in the Rafflecopter below. For more details, head on over to Kristie's Share the <3 Giveaway.


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